Ari Gold Quotes

You’re a Whore

Daan — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 22:50:08 +0000

Ari (to Amanda): You’re sorry? You’re sorry for what? You’re sorry for leaking slanderous out of context nonsense about me huh? And then rifling through all my hard work to steal my football team? Fuck you, ok? Fuck you. And now hold on a second. I’d never hit a woman in my entire life but I swear to God in my mind right now I am pummeling your smug face to a pulp for everything you did to me, my career and my family. But not to worry all right. Because I will prevail, because I’m a winner and you’re a whore with more cleavage than talent. And I will not stop untill I destroy you.

Die

Daan — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 22:38:50 +0000

(Amanda keeps calling)
Ari: I don’t want to speak to her.
Jake: Should I tell her that?
Ari: Tell her I want her to die!

Twins

Daan — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 22:36:34 +0000

Richard Branson (walks in on Ari’s family night with two hot blondes): I’m in family mode too, so…
Ari: Yes. Well played sir. I love your family.
Mrs. Ari: ARI!
Ari: Honey, he has twins. How rare is that?

Annoying

Daan — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 22:34:35 +0000

Ari: Jonah, next time boy’s night out. These girls are annoying.

Carrier Pigeons

Daan — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 22:32:39 +0000

Ari (on family night): I’m here, I’m present, I’m suffering. No phone, Blackberries or carrier pigeons.

Fucking clock

Daan — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 23:20:57 +0000

Therepist: I’m sorry, we’ll have to stop soon. Ari, can you respond to this request?
Ari: No, who could.. and fuck you with your fucking clock!

Voice

Daan — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 23:18:12 +0000

Therapist: It’s nice to see that you find your voice.
Ari: When did she not had her voice?

Finger

Daan — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 23:11:38 +0000

Ari: Listen sweetheart. You wanna call and butter me up with sympathy and then drop this on me because you think that I’m down and will take anything – let me explain this to you in a metaphor you will understand. I am sure there are guys who have fingered you in the ass long enough that eventually you let them fuck it. And now you think you got me bent over with your finger in my ass thinking I will let you do the same. I am not like you Dana. You will not FUCK ME IN THE ASS, VINCE WILL NOT PISS IN A CUP FOR YOU, OR ANYONE ELSE.

Hugs and Kisses

Daan — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 23:04:40 +0000

Ari: Why don’t we start the day off with some hugs and kisses? Everyone except for you and me Lloyd, that ain’t happening.

Rather Have Sex

Daan — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 23:00:52 +0000

Ari: If you don’t wanna talk and you don’t wanna have sex, what else is there to do in [the bedroom].
Mrs. Ari: You wanna talk?
Ari: I’d rather have sex…