Ari Gold Quotes

Lloyd: What’s wrong?
Ari: Has so much cum squirt in those eyes you can’t see what’s right in front of your face? Amanda Daniels takes that job, Vince is fucked and I’m fucked. Which means we’re all fucked. And we’re fucked in the way you like to get fucked not fucked in the way normal people like to get fucked.

Amanda: If you wanted this job you would have taken it but we both know you wont because you’ll miss your little clients too much.
Ari: And we both know that you’ve already fucked all of yours, so maybe you can move on to bigger and better.

Ari (to Alan at his funeral): I hate myself for the fact, that even today, I still don’t like you.

Mrs Ari: No business Ari, respect!
Ari: Respect means keeping business alive, even when you’re dead.

Ari (got offered Alan’s job): How would you like to be fucking a studio head baby?

Ari: What do you want?
Dana: I wanna be under you.
Ari: Dana, I told you my wife is in the car.

Lloyd: How was the funeral Ari?
Ari: It was delightful, you kidding, Alan has not looked this good in years.

Babs: Arrriii…
Ari: Babs, what’s the haps?

Babs: [The writers] wanna branch out.
Ari: Haha, to what, the circus?
Babs: Features.
Ari: Oh come on, I met those freaks. If it wasn’t for losers eating bull cock tempura they’d be lucky to produce a decent infomercial.
Babs: They’re coming after lunch, you have minute to say hello?
Ari (to Lloyd): Tell her I’m busy.
Lloyd: He’s got a lot on his plate..

Lloyd: Are you hiding something from me Ari?
Ari: Only my cock and my asshole Lloyd..