Ari Gold Quotes

Ari (telling the boys he made the Top 40 under 40): Don’t worry E., when they do a top 40 under 4 feet, BOOM, top of the list. Haha.

E: Do you ever tell the truth Ari?
Ari: I tell the parts that matter.

Ari: You don’t come to Sundance for the snow, you come for the heat.

E: I got us a lunch. 2:50 today.
A: 2:50? 2:50.. come on, everyone know 2:50 is a jerk off meeting. What’s he gonna do? Clear his throat ’till the 3 o’clock comes?

(employee suggests Vince could do a sitcom pilot)
Ari: get the fuck out. (Pauzes) Seriously. Get the fuck out. Don’t even grab a bagle. Next!

E: I’m serious, Vince needs a job!
Ari: Sounds like you might too. But I’ll tell you what, Domino’s is hiring. Why don’t you put that little pizza sign on top of your Maserati. Now that, is comedy.

Ari: Nobody’s happy in this town except for the losers. Look at me, I’m miserable, that’s why I’m rich.

Ari: Amazing you’re still showing up at school like this. Won’t let the nanny do it? Whatever they’re paying you it’s not enough.
Dana: All right, what are you doing here Ari? This is really not a good time.
Ari: OK fine. When is a good time? Tonight, your house? We’ll invite your husband, have a little slideshow, allright?

Ari: I want you to pass this message along to Dana. Tell her that I still have the pictures from Cancun, tell her that I’m gonna start a website. I will take a full page ad out in the L.A. Times advertising it. Tell her it will be called imahollywoodexecutivewhore.com and that no password or fee will be required. Tell her I Want A Fucking Call Back!

Ari: What the fuck are you wearing?
Lloyd: I’m trying out new looks. This one is my Andre 3000. You like?
Ari: No I don’t, you look like Michelle Kwan in drag. Why don’t you do a triple fucking axel over to the phone and try Cameron again.