Ari Gold Quotes » Season 2

Belt Parkway

Daan — Sun, 15 Jun 2008 16:46:00 +0000

E: We know what we wanna do next.
Ari: What? The fucking Belt Parkway?

Fuck my Assistant

Daan — Sun, 15 Jun 2008 16:41:15 +0000

E: What? You fired Emily?
Ari: I had to E. To make sure you wouldn’t fuck another one of my assistants. You’re not gonna try to fuck Lloyd are you?

Pay Up

Daan — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 06:17:11 +0000

E: I’m impressed Ari, a totally selfless meal.
Ari: Yeah, well, you’re paying, ’cause you’ve got the job.

Care About Jessica

Daan — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 06:16:23 +0000

Ari: Vince is the only client I’ve ever had that I considered a friend, all right? The only one I really cared about. I mean, Jessica Biel too, but I cared about her (opening his chop sticks) for very different reasons.

Pronto Tonto

Daan — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 06:05:30 +0000

Lloyd: Where to?
Ari: Malibu. Pronto Tonto!

Indie 500

Daan — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 06:04:07 +0000

Ari: Say goodbye to that Masarati, E. I see a shiny new Vespa in your future. (walking towards Lloyd’s stunt car)
E: Yeah, good luck in the Indie 500.
Lloyd: Morning, E!
E: Morning Lloyd.
Ari: Don’t say good morning to him!

Fucked

Daan — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 06:02:40 +0000

Ari: You even know how fucked you are? I mean, you are so fucking fucked. I mean, I think you are the most fucked person I know. (hears the bleeping sound of a car). Shit, here comes the wife. Just pretend like it’s all good.
E: You didn’t tell your wife?
Ari: No. When the time’s right, yeah.
E: When the time is right, It’s on the cover of Variety!
Ari: She doesn’t read Variety, she reads InStyle.

Lottery

Daan — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 05:59:38 +0000

Ari: What, you wanna quit too?
E: Actually, I think I might, yeah.
Ari: E! The garbage man who wins the lottery does not throw out the ticket!

Last Christmas

Daan — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 05:53:13 +0000

Lloyd (trough the intercom): It’s Lloyd, looking for Mr. Gold’s car.
Ernesto: Sorry Lloyd, it’s a company car. Mr. McQuewick said I can’t give it to him.
Ari (furious): Can’t give it to me? Ernesto! How many fucking pesos did I give you for Christmas? Huh Ernesto? Every Christmas for the past decade! Half of Mexico is eating on my chip that I’ve given you. Now bring my motherfucking car now! Por Favor!
Ernesto: Sorry, Mr. Gold. Oh, and Mr. Gold? I’m from Guatemala and our currency is the Quetzal.

Ari’s Agency

Daan — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 05:49:05 +0000

Ari: When I go, in no time, you will be repping nobodies, like Bill from the Apprentice. No one needs to make a decision right now. I will be starting my own agency. Two very important goals will apply. To make everyone, who is one, from the ground floor, rich! And to burn this motherfucking place to the ground.
Lloyd, are you with me? (Lloyd freezes and doesn’t say a thing).
Ari: Lloyd, what are you doing. You and me, we have a special bond. Come on, let’s go.
Lloyd: Ari, swear to me that you will never again say anything offensive to me about my race or my sexual orientation.
Ari: I can’t swear to that, but I promise I will always apologize after.